Right now my first and foremost love is
my PS3 and Portal 2 my husband, SharkBoy. But I think the challenge is requesting me to go back… back… into my beginnings.
My first true love budding homosexual man crush was Randy, my next door neighbour at our summer cottage back in the late 60s, early 70s. I’ve written about him before (See the post here). To this date I have an affinity for shaggy blond dudes, but in retrospect Randy was more like the big brother I wish I had, because all my older brothers saw me as a punching bag (not really, but you know how sibs are). I suspect my “love” for him was more curiosity, because I knew he really didn’t want to hang around with me most of the time – he wanted to get inside the bikini of the girl in the cottage on the opposite lot. Kind of a real life metaphor, I guess.
My first real, dyed in the wool LOVE was my best friend, Rick from Brockvegas. And unsurprising to a ten year old blog, I’ve written about him here. It was an emotional compromise for me (aren’t all relationships?) in the sense that I would rather have him as a friend and keep my true feelings from him, than lose him outright which I knew the truth would orchestrate.
I could go on about my first movie I ever loved (Star Wars, duh) or my first album I loved (The Cars – Panorama) or the first comedian I loved (Bill Cosby – Why Is There Air?) or the first travel experience I loved (running drunk on Brighton Beach) or the first time I loved myself emotionally (lone trip to Chicago) or physically (the basement reck room after one of my brother’s friends explained self-love in extreme, horrifying detail)… or many other firsts, but I won’t. Let’s just sit here and hold hands.