Last night, in my stand up comedy writing class, I invoked the name of Buck Angel. Nobody knew who he was and I bet some of you don’t either. He’s a female-to-male transsexual porn star who has had his/her breasts removed, but his (?) vagina still remains. (Google him. I’m writing at work and he’s NSFW)

I described him like this:

Hand at forehead.

“He looks like a biker: muscular, shaved head, goatee, hairy chest. So biker, biker biker…”

I move my hand down my torso.

“Biker biker biker…”

My hand gets to my pelvis.

(high voice) “… Cooter…”

Hand at mid thigh.

“…biker biker biker.”

It got a laugh. But the teacher thought the word “cooter” was too Southern Baptist and may not read on an audience. What I find funny is that she’s a woman who finds the word “cunt” funny but not “cooter”. Comedy can be so subjective.

When I first heard “cooter” I took the word in an tussled it’s spunky hair like an errant nephew. I was in love. I started to use it whenever I could:

“Lord. That lasagna looks like a cooter!”

Or even made it my own gender:

“When I sit, I have a pain in my man-cooter.”

To the point of nonsense:

“Hey see that Gas station over there? I think we need to fill up and cooter the windscreen!”

I’m going to keep it in the bit. I can only try, right?

5 thoughts on “Subjective

  1. Evil Panda

    Love the word Cooter. Back in High School, my group of friends all gave each other white trash nicknames, and mine was Cooter.

    Love Buck Angel, too, but that is a different story.

  2. Roy

    Hello again Mr Robot –

    Speaking of vulgarity & humor, have you seen the Peter Clarke bloopers? Clarke was the Australian cheese commercial guy in the ’80s. Aussie accents crack me up to begin with, but when they’re spewing profanities they make me literally fall off the chair laughing:

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