Acting Out

Celebs and Media, Distractions, Improv/Comedy

On Thursday I responded to an ad on craigslist for REAL tradespersons to be in a Govt of Canada/Ontario(?) commercial, no experience required. Off goes my headshot and a white lie of my skills and the headhunter calls me within 30 minutes.

I blush! That fast!

Okay I know what you’re thinking, I barely know which way a hammer goes (the heavy sidey thing hits the flatty sided thingamagigger). But I did do cedar siding for cottages around my home town when I was a teen so it’s not THAT much of a stretch, okay? With all my butch clothes from working at the Black Eagle, I had a ton of clothing options, so I was pretty hopeful to get a callback. (taps fingers)

Auditions were just like I remember them from Queer As Folk: the actors greeting each other and exchanging work info like hobos giving rail riding tips. Plus there were a few REAL tradespeople who I avoided in case I got called out. One guy had drywall dust all over him and I was instantly jealous of his character choice.

I’m called and I saunter past the actors trying out for office parts. All eyes on the REAL guy going in.

I stand and deliver a 30 second monologue of my skills. Done! The guy before me was equally fast so I couldn’t tell my chances.

After, I met up with SharkBoy and went into HomeSense to oo and aa over bear lamps.

Shrug. Wish me luck.

8 thoughts on “Acting Out

  1. Dead Robot

    Careful! Richard Ouzounian will come to your house and slap you silly for mentioning that article.

    I’ll leave the serious stuff to the trained professionals.

  2. snotty

    Hey, your brother’s play Drawer Boy was picked as best play of the last decade in the National Post yesteday. If it’s restaged, you could try out for that.

  3. craig

    YES! There you go, you naked with just the toolbelt on. Now we are getting closer to you getting that audition! 😉

    And where do we get to see your weiner? Gawd knows mine is posted everywhere!

  4. Dead Robot

    Don/craig: there are plenty sites out there where you can see my wiener. Or you could ask. Sheesh!

    cb: the guy who came in after me put on a window washing harness that probably has never seen the light of day – spotless, probably bought/borrowed for the audition, much like the toolbelt I had with me.

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