Category Archives: Hobbies

When my butt isn’t in this chair…

What Did You Think Would Happen?

Hobbies

You’re in a dank cave and suddenly a dragon rears it’s scaly head and comes at you. You raise your magical sword and start hacking. After a few good slashing blows, the dragon looks like it’s only just begun to fight, so you toss the damn sword at the monster.

It’s Match Point. Your opponent is staring you down from across the net. You need to win this to prove to the world that you can be the best in the over 30s circuit. You lob the ball into the air and throw your racket across the net.

Fisihin’ time! They’re biting too! Quick! Get your rod and throw it into the lake!

Would you do any of this? Then why is Nintendo taking responsibility for the straps on their Wii controllers and offering a recall?

Grand Theft Auto – Vice City Stories

Hobbies

I’m 3 missions into this game for the PSP and already I’ve heard the F-bomb 4 times, have seen a man threaten a woman repeatedly with beatings, experienced a bestiality porno video (played on a VCR just out of view during a cut-away scene), seen a character snort more coke than Robert Downey Jr. and attacked mercilessly “cholos” because they were muscling in on my turf.

I LOVE THIS GAME!

Me & My Katamari

Hobbies

Me & My Katamari for the PSP is like a sticky, nubbly orb of stuff, rolling around in your head, picking up the fluff and fostam and creating a great big ball of fun. If you have a PSP, go get this game now.

kata003.jpg
Nice boobies, Madonna!

Upside? The King of Cosmos spends the entire game in a leotard swimsuit, legs akimbo, his bulbous crotch the aiming point for the prince to rocket off to the next game. He still spouts bizzare sentence shards of logic and mythology. The music rocks (thankfully missing are some of the lame choices from KM2) and can be chosen for each adventure. None of the addictive game play is lost in shrinking Katamari to the PSP

Downside? There only seems to be 6 areas (with variations) in the main game, repeated depending on the goals required of you by the King, so play gets a bit “easy” near to the end. There are 5 different challenges that can be peppered in between these games which help. The worst is the controls. So ackward. Without the ease of two analog sticks, you have to rely on subtle twists and nudges from the R and L buttons to manouver.

Other than that, an extremely satisfying game.

Last Night’s Show – Upcoming Shows

General, Hobbies, Improv/Comedy

What a frigging rush last night was! The energy of the room was so charged I felt like I could say “poop!” and people would laugh. I did a great set of “Slow Motion Commentary” (think MXC but with the athletes moving in slow motion) with Lisa, Evangeline and Rene that killed. “Imma Go Git” was fun but I fell out of character near the end of it (I had to be blind in one eye, talk using Western phrases and trip every third step). The rest whizzed by so quickly… I have to single out Evangeline for the best line of the evening: Her line during a Film Noir short scene with Earl brought the house down: “You’re cheap like a $0.10 steak and just as tough.” Brilliant! Obviously she’s been studying!

Our next “Happy Monkeys – Invaders from The Danforth” show will be Sunday October 15th.

I’ll be up on stage again at the Bad Dog theatre this Friday at 10pm for their “That Friday Show”. Face time!

Introducing…

Hobbies, Personal Bits, Queer stuff

George Hamilton“George Hamilton“. (Also, check out Seasie awards pix and The Twin Peaks Hotel. Worksafe if you like drag queens.)

Or “Georgie” when we’re feeling cute.

Or “Goddamnit George” when he’s clawing the couch.

Or “Blgarglb! Fuck!” when George Hamilton pushes his butt into my face while I’m sleeping.

Thanks AP for the name. We’re going to try it for a while and see where that morphs to.

And for you people who like freaks, I give you Mu Mu Monday.

Last Class Pics

Hobbies, Toronto

Gord's Last First Class…are here. Actually I start into Advanced Short Form Improv next Thursday, so it’s not really an “ending” yet. But I will miss doing scenes with these galoots! The night was fun, high energy and full of gufaws. I was even quoted in one of the scenes (“notice how her tounge always points magnetic north?”), thank you Earl.

I’m still going through “shoulda coulda woulda have said…” which is natural post-performance.

Out Into the Big World, or Up and Coming Performances

Hobbies, Personal Bits

I’m nearing the end of my Bad Dog Theatre course (2 classes to go!) and it’s been a fun and emotional 32 weeks. Mostly hillarious. It would suck bad if it was 32 weeks of sad improv. I’m feeling a bit down that I don’t have this outlet anymore however there are other classes I could take to fine tune my improv abilities, but there will be a needy “gimmie attention!” vacuum every Wednesday now.

Over the four months there were a few points that stick out in my mind:

The look my teacher Gord Oxley gave me when I was doing my character Q&A and I derailed his questioning and turned the whole interview homo.

Joseph pushing the boundaries hard: He was the first to mention a Lithuanian Steamer as breakfast cereal. He’s now in L.A. pitching a TV show to Sony. I wish him luck because he’s wicked talented and smart.

I ended a scene with Lara by suggesting we become “fuck buddies”. I was the first to use the f-bomb.

Meek Michelle blowing us all away by entering a scene by telling Earl to “Fuck off!”

Earl. Just Earl doing his deaf/codgety old guy shtick. Earl pulled out a few really good characters but I will always remember his “old guy in the elevator”.

Sue’s glances to the class when she’s on stage, looking for confirmation that what she just did/said was funny. In itself, that made me laugh.

Lisa’s outrageous French accent and her ability to accept whatever I threw at her.

Jennifer’s physicality. She actually makes you feel like she’s wrestling a snake.

Ahhh good times, good times…

“But Ted,” you interject, “How can we, as an audience, experience this comedy first hand (because god knows it’s not funny when you blog about it)?”

Glad you asked. Wed Aug 30th is our student show and is by invite only due to limited seating. Mine are taken, sorry. But our alumni is currently in discussions to do a night at the Victory Cafe. If they’ll have us. I’ll keep you posted on those dates.

So. Any suggestions as to what I should do next? I’m not going back to ROTC, so flag twirling is out. Musical theatre?