Category Archives: Personal Bits

Just things from my personal life


Personal Bits, Tech, You Stupid Dick 4 Replies

Want to see something cool?


It’s my URL, right? To anyone, these look like two nested subdomains belonging to me, purely because the “dotcom” is in it’s proper place and all that.

Okay go ahead and click it – no worries, I’ll wait.

Ta Da! That site is Not Mine. In fact I have no clue why this site comes up. That page is a perfect copy of this page. I suspect it’s in place for some nefarious reason that I really don’t want any part of.

How did I discover this? I got an email from a chap in Australia saying that this page

is phishing for sign ins on his site,

Of course I’m mortified. I’ve checked all my logs and stats and quite frankly I’m baffled. I have no clue how they’re redirecting to their subdomains while using my domain name.

While trying different combinations of subdomains, I ran across that example above. Someone has my “brand” and is fucking with it. I’m not happy.

I’ve passed this on to my host provider but for the first time in my career as a web guy, I feel old. I feel like I’ve been bettered. That dreaded feeling that technology is passing even ME by.


Personal Bits 2 Replies

I wake up this morning with the first thought in my head being: “I need to call Dad and see how…”

Then sleep leaves me fully and I remember. I lay there in bed for a few minutes fighting back the monster of depression and breathe slowly. Gone.

Rationally I try to figure out why this just happened. And in a sense, it goes hand in hand why I haven’t blogged much over the last couple months. I haven’t written not because I don’t have anything to say, but I have definitely lost my voice.

Last month, my mother moved to town. Regular readers of this blog will suddenly realize I’ve written very little about my mother while new readers will look sideways at the regular readers for some kind of reaction. Sort of like a newbie follower sitting with a hard core fan, sitting down to watch Dexter mid-season.

My Mom. We’re different. Always have been. At an early age I knew that she was an enigma in my life. Some strange woman who would issue discipline and ultimatums in the absence of my father (which was pretty much Monday to Friday) who, while I was learning and loving crayons, paper and art, she was learning and manipulating numbers, going on to become a very accomplished accountant. When my father came out of the closet, we bonded beyond father/son into pupil and mentor. You can guess why my relationship with my mother was not ever close, especially when my father and subsequently myself, revealed our sexual preferences.

In fact, Mon and I didn’t speak for about 4 years, 20 years ago, for a reason I won’t drag out into the open. To this day we haven’t spoken about the silence that occurred between us. I doubt that we will. But somewhere along the way we silently made up and continued our long distance relationship as mother/son in situ.

A year before Da died, Mom made noises about moving to Toronto to be near family again. Near the kids and the shops and the theatres. The big joke there was that she’d live in the same building as Da and they’d be neighbours and ain’t life weird, like some Fox sitcom? Then Dad passed and within a decent amount of time, Mom made the move to Toronto, not to the same building but to a condo one down the block and shockingly similar to the building she just left, the only difference being a slightly smaller apartment and a new front desk concierge.

Now she’s in town, she’s 99% unpacked and at 78 years old, obviously needs help unpacking, setting up and getting things back to the way she likes it. This weekend I have to move a 175 pound sculpture into the hall where she had it before in Brockvegas. Next week will probably be assembling armoires and such.

You can see what is happening here (see title: blog post). With little time between caring for parents I’ve fallen back into the rut of explaining how the internet works, how computers work, how TVs work. “Rut” is such a harsh word. I don’t mind doing this, in fact (without trying to sound maudlin or “mea culpa” at all) I sort of think this is my ultimate reason for being here.

However, the other day she showed me a purchase she made in a boutique in Yorkville with the comment “I’m spending your inheritance” which was Da’s catch-phrase when he justified his trips to South America. I know that somewhere in me, I don’t think I’ve processed Dad’s passing fully. Nor do I think any amount of time will fix that.

Bonne Anniversaire

Personal Bits, Queer stuff, You Magnificent Bastard 6 Replies

5 years ago we nervously stood in front of a room full of people and declared our love for each other. If I could do it all over again I wouldn’t change a thing (well, maybe put my Audio Brother in charge of music… Would have liked the drag queen to perform instead of being monopolized by my mom).

The last couple years have been a real roller coaster, to say the least. I don’t know how I would have gotten through most of it without you.

On the upside, we’ve had some amazeballs adventures and I can’t wait for many, many more!

Let’s hit that steakhouse and crack open some wine!

I love you!







That I Can Do, Too!

Hobbies, I'm going to tell you what to do, Personal Bits, political, Queer stuff, Toronto 2 Replies

I took postbear’s words to heart and thought I should start out small – I’ve decided to walk (march?) in the Scotiabank AIDS Walk, this Sept 25th. I don’t think, however, I will be selling off space on my suit, unless I’m offered some ridiculous sum of money. Hint Hint PrideFM?

Within a few hours of tweeting my decision, long time internet friend (and one embarrassingly drunk pick up attempt night at the Eagle) “Bark” aka Steve K dropped $50 into my sponsor jar!

I’m off to a great start!

Here are the details:

My Sponsor Page: My goal is low – this is my first time doing anything like this, but secretly I’d love to crest $2000. Expect some aggressive tweets and boring blog posts. Why not donate now to shut me up early!? Plenty of payment options!

If you want to make a PayPal donation, my account is “deadrobot” At “rocketmail” dot com. Every little bit helps!

The Event: Starts around 11am and I’ll most likely get there early because who doesn’t want to get a photo with a Sandtrooper?

I’ll keep you posted on how I’m doing.

Wish me luck!

Without Da

Personal Bits 3 Replies

Missing my Dad this year, at Pride

Many Pride celebrations I would get frustrated with trying to organize friends, wrangling them like a sack of wet cats. But there was one person I didn’t have to call or text or pre-plan where to meet: my Da.

In fact whenever Church Street closed for whatever reason, I would always come across Da in the crowd. Halloween, Pride, Fetish Fair: when he would emerge through the crowd our greeting was as if we had not seen each other in years. We would make all around know we were gay father and gay son, meeting as accepted equals.

This year it was hard to look into the crowd, knowing he wouldn’t emerge. I miss him every day, but today was a bit rough.

The lesson you should take away from this? Take a moment and love the fuck out of whatever you love. Seriously, life is pretty tenuous and should not be taken for granted.

Pride, Day One

Personal Bits, political, Queer stuff, Toronto 3 Replies

Just back from Pride where just two hours ago they closed the streets and people are still streaming into the neighbourhood. The energy is building.

While waiting for BobaDoug, SharkBoy and I sat on the wall outside the 519 Community Centre, where we were entertained by a young, slightly high lesbian youth who wanted to know all about my Five Finger shoes. She and I eventually left the topic of shoes and got into a game of shouting “HAPPY CANADA DAY!!” at random people. SharkBoy was in stitches because, in true Torontonian fashion, when you yell a greeting at a stranger in this town they instantly put on this face of “Oh my god you are yelling at me and if I ignore you, you might disappear…”

Of course the slightly high lesbian youth would yell “Happy Cananaerrday!” and that made me laugh.

Regardless, here are some pics! Enjoy!


Let them eat Cake

The Bunny of Pride


Bal Cone


Personal Bits, Tech Leave a reply

I walk in on two Starbucks baristas (one of them my ultimate favorite human service drone person lady), mid-conversation:

“Come on, Dana! Take it and run with it!”

“I guess…”

“No, do it! Own it!”

They look at me and smile. I jump in: “Yeah! Own it!”

“Yeah Dana!”

“Own that thing!” I continue,”Become this thing! Take it by… the throat! Slam it into …the counter! Yes! slam it into the counter a couple times!” I motion this as my eyes flash, “And then find a bucket and push it’s head under the water!! Watch and savour EVERY bubble that comes out!!”


We all look at each other.

“My usual please.”

I’ve been watching too much Evangelion.