I’ll give you all the readers digest version as that it’s not so interesting if you’re not family.

Friday, Dad, Michele and Rhino and I went to Costco to get some tasty treats for the reception. We spend the rest of the day prepping chocolate covered strawberries to be served with champagne. While I’m on Da’s computer, from the other room I can hear Michele say “Let’s try one.” Pause. “Eurgh!” Mumble mumble mumble… “Get Ted to try one.”

Da brings me a delicious looking chocolate strawberry. So tempting but seconds after biting into one, my mouth is filled with chalk. They had used bitter chocolate instead of semi-sweet. Barf! Off to the store Michele and I go, to replace half the tray they’d started but never tested. Thankfully, the Officiate who did the ceremony loves bittersweet chocolate. They didn’t go to waste.

Then we all go to Olympic Pizza for all the family that had arrived so far. They meet Andy, the Officiate, and we nosh on some predicable, but welcome food. After we go back to the condo party room and set up some. The room seems larger when you empty it of chairs and couches and put in a sole “hoopa” (what we were calling the “altar”).

Saturday. The big day! Sharkboy and I get up to wander down to St Lawrence Market for more reception goodies and wander back to Da’s to finish up the room. No problems encountered, except a caution to anyone renting from Alligator Party Rentals. Check everything you get and make sure you have lots of ID when renting from them. Apparently just a credit card doesn’t cut it for the meager amount we got. And note: a couple glasses were cracked and the linen was dirty. Despite that, the tables were set with pieces that Da had salvaged from his stint as volunteer at The Gardiner Museum.

At noon, the Healeys met the Paquettes for a semi-formal lunch at the Brownstone, arranged by Mom. Actually the Healeys outnumbered the Paquettes 2:1. It was a bit difficult to mix it up when the table was split down the middle by both families. Lesson learned: stagger guests.

Back to the room after lunch and chilled the Champagne. A few last touches and the room was ready. Rehearsal at 5 went by lurchingly. We were all tired, dirty and Andy confessed that this was his first same sex marriage. And the first time he was marrying a friend so he was a bit nervous to get it right. A few tears and lots of nervous laughing, but we managed to get through it ok twice.

Home, dressed, and back to the room for 7. Guests started to arrive 7:30pm. The ceremony started 8:15pm and was done by 9:50pm. Photos by Rod and Bill with family. I have to say that Rod and Bill did a fantastic job with their cameras. Very professional and fun to have at the party to boot!

It went by far too fast. I remember most of it. I wish I could have slowed down before and after the ceremony. I know I didn’t get to talk to half the people as much as I would like and I’m certain I missed a few.

Notables:

My niece Charlotte did a little number half way through the night while she wore a “Body Rock” rap suit. You might remember them from the 90s: little velcro buttons attached to various parts of your body, when pressed makes the speaker worn on your hip chirp out sampled drum/cymbal/rap beats. It was hilarious! Apparently I got one at a garage sale during a big family dinner back in the 90s. She jumped on the chance to borrow her friend’s so that she could entertain the crowd.

Candy Barr showed up to my wedding. Unfortunately the speaker system was way too quiet to perform for a room of 50++ but she did manage to put some jealous faces on sisters, sisters in law, mothers and friends with her outfit and figure. As long as I live, I will never forget my brother John’s girlfriend, Heather, go white eyed and pallid when Candy breezed by the first time. Candy managed to hit it off with my Mom for a while, but I didn’t find out what they talked about.

Thanks to all the Happy Monkeys who showed. Rain and my brother in law, Rhino started to yell at each other in German to which JoyAnn commented “Are they fighting? Or just greeting each other?” They suppressed the urge to yell out “Sounds like a Song!” or “Should have said!” during the ceremony. Thank god.

Thanks to both my and Sharkboy’s co-workers for coming! You were a select few!

The Postman hit on my dad a few times. The Busdriver wondered aloud about when his turn to get married would be. Many times. Jackal (that is, Jack and Michael) looked dashing and Jack was congratulated a few times, being mistook for Sharkboy!

I have to single out a couple people here though:

Fort and Andre: Da’s friends who volunteered to do service all night. I don’t know who else I would have got. They did a super job even after I barked orders at them like Bridezilla when vases started to fall in the breeze. Or candles weren’t lit 2 minutes before the doors were to be opened. How did they put up with me?

Michele and Rhino for cutting their vacation short and spending a few air miles to be part of the day. Same goes for Dan and Mark too. Both brother and sister (and sig. others) reworked their schedules to attend the wedding. Thank you for making the effort and thank you for brining Bernice, the nice Irish ex-wife! I forgot how much I loved her! She lit up the room!

Sylve, Pogo, Max and Shawn: Hell of a speedy weekend. I wish we could have spent more time. Pogo, thanks for walking my mom home at the end of the night. Sylvie: you did a great job representing Sharkboy’s parents. Max, you looked like $1,000,000 and Shawn, I want to see that video soon! I hope you all meshed with the Healeys, they like you very much.

Mom: I know how much you wanted to take over with the preparations. I know it wasn’t the most conventional wedding, but we had a specific vision as to what was going to happen on our day: fast and low key. Thank you for the lunch and thank you for coming. And thank you for hauling that picture of me at 11 years of age, smiling like a moron for the camera, wearing a two tone, velour turtleneck sweater, all around the part for everyone to see. Including co-workers. I love you!

Dad: What can we say? We’ve said “Thank You” about 100 times a day, more so as the wedding approached. You did so much and respected when we wanted so little. Without your help, we’d have done the “After work at the City Hall” elope plan (which I’m glad we didn’t!) You held things together, you hauled things out of storage, you grounded us when we started to wobble off track. I suspect you did a lot more behind the scenes than we actually know about because the day went off so effortlessly. I can’t say thank you enough. You made the day.

And finally, Sharkboy. Meesh. I knew everything was going to be great when you came back from the last dollar store run for supplies. Out of the bag came a light-up Spongebob Squarepants pen that we were to use to sign the register. And we DID. When I saw that pen, I knew that we were going to have a great night. A great start to our lives together. I love you so much.

Oh and by the way, bitch… “For Richer and Richer”? You bastard! You improv trumped me!

Images of the wedding preparations, here.

Images of the wedding, here