I Asked Nicely, Now Hire Me

Work

Still wading through cover letters and resumes for a Jr Designer.

It certainly is an eye opening experience to see some of these “portfolios”. What are teachers at these meat grinding, fly-by-night “media” schools telling these kids? “Oh don’t bother learning HTML, Dreamweaver will fill in the tags for you. And speaking of tags, go ahead and use the font tag all you want. It won’t be delineated for years now. And while you’re at it, make sure the guy you’re trying to impress can’t see a clear picture of your work. Yeah use Flash as much as you can because that’s the future of web design.”

Two things that turn me off in a portfolio: religious references of any kind (Peace and Divinity!) and “arty” pictures of scantily clad women (some wearing the same bikini!) in the bushes at Scarborough Bluffs. You can see in the model’s eyes the dream of being Canada’s Next Top Model but they’re seconds away from an inappropriate suggestion of loosening the straps for a more “real” shot.

And just a quick note about resumes: I don’t read everything on them because I really don’t care if someone worked for Dunkin Donuts ten years ago. I’d rather see 2 year old school work projects than be informed of past horrendous crap jobs that have no relation to the job you’re applying to.

And finally: If you’re going to use a free web hosting company to park your portfolio, please don’t use that company’s free site building template. Especially if you’re applying for designer. Dork.

6 thoughts on “I Asked Nicely, Now Hire Me

  1. Dan

    “And finally: If you’re going to use a free web hosting company to park your portfolio, please don’t use that company’s free site building template. Especially if you’re applying for designer. Dork.”

    Delicious.

    It shames me, but I still haven’t purged my sites completely of font tags. Then again, I’m not pretending to be a profeshunal either – just a nerdy amateur who codes by by whenever possible.

    arf.

  2. Dead Robot

    You could do catering! Or be an extra for various tax write off Toronto shot movies!

  3. madamerouge

    I know why the font tag is a bad idea! It’s because not all browsers support all fonts.

    It’s all about the CSS.

    There. Do I now know enough to be considered? (tee hee!) Note the tastefully modified “Mr. Moto” template on my clog. I’m S-M-R-T !

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