Tag Archives: gas millage

Some Stats (That I Really Don’t Watch… really…)

Distractions, Tech

I know that stat reporting to your readership is as exciting as an Annual General Meeting for Canadian Chartered Accountants. But the plugin WordPress.com Stats is like those new President Choice Blue Cheese and Hot Wings chips: So addictive, I will probably keel over from it.

Domain owners with WordPress and WP.com bloggers can install it as a Plugin (you’ll need your API Key). Best of all, it’s free! Instantly you can watch your incoming/outgoing stats bloom like a tense parent watching their sexually budding child go out on Prom Night.

It also does a great job logging Google searches that brought people to your site. For fun, here’s the last few searches:

restaurant makeover 4
killman zoo 3
dead robot pictures 3
hey ashley whatchoo playing 2
attack photos 2
amy good gorilla 1
restaurant makeover death watch 1
improv gas millage 1
jamaica labadee pot 1
grapefruit moon restaurant makeover sued 1
tony blair shirtless 1

Thirteen people came here from Sharkboy.ca alone yesterday. 5 from clicking on their Google Reader feeds. I average 188 unique page views per day. Since installing it 5 days ago, my Pride Tips For Out of Towners is my top post! I’m so helpful!

Word Trends I Despise

Distractions, General

Dad Safari: This has been going on a while over on Flickr. Its the clandestine act of taking picture of “hot guys” and posting them to the interweb. I’m sure the rush is fun but the act itself, to me, seems like an utter violation of that person’s privacy. While whole communities try to stave the onslaught of CCTV cameras in England, US and here in Canada, we now have to worry about some dork with a cell phone camera posting your picture online, displaying your face like some neanderthal hunter displaying heads on his den wall. Okay, he’s cute, I get it. Put your dick back in your pants and wait ten seconds, there’s going to be another “hot guy” along in a moment.

Yummy Mummy: No offense should be taken by any woman who is a mother, but do we have to categorize them with a word that implies edibility? To make motherhood cute and juvenile within the connotation of sexuality just smacks of cannibal-paedophilism. I know there are sexy moms out there, that’s why we have “MILF”.

Hypermililng: For American brethren who might not have heard this new word, it means to drive economically to save gas, to save money at the pumps. Created by a Torontonian, it implies that when you drive accordingly, you will either stretch out your gas millage or the two Imperial Cruisers might just catch you. The concept is easy: drive slow, drive constant, drive safe. So… don’t drive like a douchenozzle (like you should be doing ANYWAY) and you might save money? (swats head)