Some Stats (That I Really Don’t Watch… really…)

Distractions, Tech

I know that stat reporting to your readership is as exciting as an Annual General Meeting for Canadian Chartered Accountants. But the plugin Stats is like those new President Choice Blue Cheese and Hot Wings chips: So addictive, I will probably keel over from it.

Domain owners with WordPress and bloggers can install it as a Plugin (you’ll need your API Key). Best of all, it’s free! Instantly you can watch your incoming/outgoing stats bloom like a tense parent watching their sexually budding child go out on Prom Night.

It also does a great job logging Google searches that brought people to your site. For fun, here’s the last few searches:

restaurant makeover 4
killman zoo 3
dead robot pictures 3
hey ashley whatchoo playing 2
attack photos 2
amy good gorilla 1
restaurant makeover death watch 1
improv gas millage 1
jamaica labadee pot 1
grapefruit moon restaurant makeover sued 1
tony blair shirtless 1

Thirteen people came here from alone yesterday. 5 from clicking on their Google Reader feeds. I average 188 unique page views per day. Since installing it 5 days ago, my Pride Tips For Out of Towners is my top post! I’m so helpful!

12 thoughts on “Some Stats (That I Really Don’t Watch… really…)

  1. Dead Robot

    Boyzillian, you say? boyzillian…hmmm.

    I checked this morning and I found “date of homosexual parade of toronto” and I knew without reverse-searching that it was some right-winged kook looking for a nice place to stand with “god dislikes them homos a great deal” signs.

  2. Vanyel

    Geeze, that reminds me of the time I mentioned the term “boyzilian” about that type of waxing, in passing and in humour in a post, and my stats went off the chart (like from 50-100 per day to 500-700 per day) for about two weeks afterwards. Makes me wonder what people are doing out there!

    The one that had me scratching my head yesterday was “marco chancho porn”, it showed up numerous times in the searches that brought people to the blog. It must be that new feature on WP hosted blogs that shows similar posts at the end of something you have written. I think it needs a wee bit of tweaking, as I’ve looked at some of the suggested similar posts and some of them are “out there”.

    Now there’s something to try for fun… put up a nonsense post for a day or two with some “interesting” search term words in it, and see what happens to the traffic.

  3. Dead Robot

    cb: is there any other way to do a post about Male Brazilian Waxing?

    Romach: I use to write for a city based blog here in town and they used MoveableType. Hate! So full of hate when it would mangle my posts. WP is by far the best.

  4. cb

    Dude, I did a post on Male Brazilian waxing (humerous take) but that one post gets MORE HITS than any other one. And I posted it a year ago.

    It’s crazy what some people search.

  5. Dead Robot

    Madame, that is my job all day long.

    “I need a flyer for the Globe and Mail to have clicks to our packages.”

    “I see.”

  6. madamerouge

    I once forwarded a coworker an e-mail with a URL that didn’t have the hyperlinking active. He called me and said “when I click on it, nothing happens.” I replied, “that’s ok, just copy the address, open your browser, and paste it in.”

    “What’s a browser?” he replied.

    “You know,” I said. “The program we use to access the Internet. Internet Explorer.”


    [cut to me, pulling hair from my thigh through the fabric of my dress pants]

  7. Dead Robot

    Steve R: I’m not the oldest blogger out there, but I feel like I’ve had this site since CERN released the idea of the internet to the US. Does it smell funny here?

    Phronk: I wonder the same thing! What the hell?! These days I’m leaving off the “.com” for shitz and gigglez when I type in the addy bar, just to see what happens.

  8. Dead Robot

    Madame: my longest running search term has been Tony Blair Shirtless. Still getting hits long after his reign. And yes I got your email… Didn’t I say the cowboy was hot? Or was that to someone on flickr? Virtual alzheimers…

  9. Phronk

    It always amuses me to see that people Google “” (like they did “”), because either they mistook the search box for the address box, or don’t realize that Google isn’t the only way to get to a web site.

  10. madamerouge

    those new President Choice Blue Cheese and Hot Wings chips

    1. didya get my message about the Doritos Collisons commercial & the hot cowboy?

    2. I just came from my account; one of my recent pageloads was “asiago vomit” LOL LOL LOL! That post I did about barf cheese is STILL paying dividends.

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