iSilence Day One

Celebs and Media, Tech, Toronto

I’ve been stewing over an article by Andrew Sullivan wrote a while back claiming that the iPod is the first horseman of the apocalypse.

Even without the white wires, you can tell who they are. They walk down the street in their own MP3 cocoon, bumping into others, deaf to small social cues, shutting out anyone not in their bubble.

snip

Get on a subway, and you’re surrounded by a bunch of Stepford commuters, all sealed off from each other, staring into mid-space as if anaesthetized by technology. Don’t ask, don’t tell, don’t over-hear, don’t observe. Just tune in and tune out.

snip

Technology has given us finally a universe entirely for ourselves – where the serendipity of meeting a new stranger, or hearing a piece of music we would never choose for ourselves, or an opinion that might actually force us to change our mind about something are all effectively banished.

What gloom and doom! Goodness! Its like he’s never heard of the New York Times vs The Post and the fact that there are open minded people out there who read both. Or that people post things (usually with links) to their blogs that might challenge our thought processes, as Mr Sullivan did with his blog (it would seem the irony is lost here but I am sure its due to his iPod). I remember clearly back in the late 70s when Sony’s Walkman hit the market. The exact whining that the fabric of social interaction was going to unravel like a machine washed Prada sweater went on and on, even so far to see the walkman deemed illegal in certain situations. In my opinion, the acceptance of drugs and alcohol have more to do with the downfall of social interaction than a device that brings us music.

(I) realized I had left my iPod behind. Panic. But then something else. I noticed the rhthyms of others again, the sound of the airplane, the opinions of the cabby, the small social cues that had been obscured before. I noticed how others related to each other. And I felt just a little bit connected again. And a little more aware. Try it. There’s a world out there. And it has a soundtrack all its own.

I decided to “try it” and leave the iPod, Gameboy and books at home while travelling on public transit for seven days (the only time I actually use these to shut out the world). No distractions. Pure observations. I will record what I’ve heard (and seen if its of any importance to my spiritual growth) here daily. This may bore you and I hope it does. Apparently Mr Sullivan wants you to experience “life” in its yawning fullest.

Ladies and Gentlemen: Day 1!

Audio:
Woman on cellphone: “I know. I am on the streetcar right now. I am headed to the office. No. No. (pause) (heavy sigh) NO. Look. No.” (it continues in this vein. She’s getting looks from people around her with each “no”).

Asian couple behind me engaged in conversation using a dialect I have no hope in deciphering.

Couple of students too far away to actually hear what they’re saying but the explosion of laughter makes a couple people sitting near me turn their heads to look.

Visual:
Many people without iPods or CD players still block the doorway of the subway and even less move to allow people to get on or off.

More people reading papers than iPod/music players. Small percentage of that have both book/music player combo. Good for them for reading, I can hear Andrew say.

Opinion:
For the most part, not a lot of people were talking which has been pretty much the norm as long as I can remember and I’ve been taking transit in Toronto since the late 70s. As for the “serendipity of meeting someone”, there was not one single person who stuck out in my mind, not even a good looking bear I wanted to snog. I did notice that Newsweek put Martha’s head on a great body and slapped it up on their cover. But that came from sneaking a peek at a newspaper story. I guess I could have engaged the person beside me regarding this “technological wonder” but I would have been deemed a “streetcar freak” because you just don’t do that on public transit.

What do they serve at their get togethers?

Queer stuff, Toronto

From my inbox:

Toronto Small Penis Club

Hi Guys,

Looking for other small dicked guys in Toronto to join my club.
Possible get togethers etc adn who knows where it will lead. Please
ensure that your age, sex and location is in your profile when joining

Hope to see you all soon

J – (32years old, 6’2″ 175 Lbs, cute and only 4.5″ uncut in TO)

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/TorontoSmallPenisSupport/

Hope to see you all soon?! It will be a short meeting, I’m sure.

iSilence Day 2

Distractions, Tech, Toronto

Friday, March 4th, 6:30pm, Carlton Streetcar

Audio:
“What nigger do I know with the name Cameron with a Winnie the Pooh hat? Hold on. (fudges with his phone) Hulo? Hullo? (repeat seven times). Beet? I know no nigger with that name.” (This guy would be Andrew Sullivan’s nightmare: he was on the phone, talking simo on two lines AND had walkman ear buds with music coming out of them still in his ears as he tried to wrangle callwaiting. The conversation went on from there but as soon as he used the N word, the white people in the car got all “I’m not really listening but I AM”)

“This is Carlton. At Yonge, it turns into College. You’re going the wrong direction.”

“I cannot operate this streetcar while you are over that white line. You will have to move in or get off.”

“What does he think this is, a Democracy? Tell the asshole to get off the steps.” (of the front entrance to the streetcar)

“Just going to squeeze past your napsack there. Its a bit like country dancing.”

Visual:
Asian guy with a folding chair much like they use on WWE, trying to get on a ful streetcar.

Guy on subway who looked alot like Fabio with his leg up on the centre pole, looking alarmingly drunk.

Opinion:
This was a rough trip without my iPod. I got home hating humanity especially having to put up with this double standard racism in my ear. I dont even like using the word “fag” when referring to my friends.

The Party is Over

Tech

I just went to a site and nearly clicked on a popup ad that had bypassed Firefox’s anti-popup software.

It was one of those “phake” ads that look like system messages. I had become so use to not having any ads in the last while I was actually hovering over it ready to click on it to say OK.

I bet lots of people are going to do that in the next little while.

My New Mom

Personal Bits, Queer stuff

A while ago my Da shocked the hell out of Sharkboy and I by not informing us that Sunday dinner would be shared with the man he tricked with all weekend: a 6’4″ African American adult student from Detroit, relocating to Toronto to go to Ryerson (I say “adult student” because they met at one of Da’s over 40, Prime Timers meeting). Imagine my surprise when I entered Da’s condo, noticed the fourth place setting and ask “Who else is coming to dinner?” and this gentleman comes out of the bedroom. Charming guy. Nice. Completely not like Da’s other tricks and dates, thats fer sher. Many were the jokes that evening of him being my “new Mom”, including my favorite: “Can I have my allowance, now?”

Then I got to thinking who would make a great Mom within the circle of friends/acquaintances I have. Here is an assessment of some with “Pushover Factor” (that is, would I be able to manipulate “mom” to do my bidding, one being “nope” and ten being “playdough!”):

Sharkboy: Beyond the obvious therapy I would need to go through if my Da and he were to start dating, I would require plenty of notice if I were to drop by their home. I wouldn’t want to see any form of coo-cooing or schmoopie doopie love talk lest I be sent into brain-locking fits.
Pushover Factor: 2. I know what buttons to push but he’s pretty crafty.

The Mailman: I think he would make my dad laugh. A lot. And they share the same anal sense of apartment living (git yer mind out of the gutter). But they’d butt heads too. Both are pretty stubborn.
Pushover Factor: 10. One whine from me and The Mailman caves. My voice is like that.

The Busdriver: I think these two would the most compatable together. They’re both home bodies, both like the quiet life with the odd shock ‘n play thrown in for fun. But the Busdriver would nag my Da when Da exerts his independence. I cant say why, I just feel it. I doubt that they’d monogamous, though. Hell I think with any of these guys Da wouldn’t be monogamous…
Pushover Factor: 4. He has seen me lie and knows when my tone changes to manipulation, Jedi-mind-trick level.

Vancouver Mike/Swollen Uvula: The most active Mom of the bunch. He’d take him bike riding and go on walks and enjoy Da’s kitchen. The horror for me would be that the two of them would gang up on me and start to berate me into fixing my life.
Pushover Factor: 8. Garlic Mashed Potatos and he’s mine.

Those are the top 4. I would have done online aquaintences but they’re a bit hard to judge. I know if DumbFuck was Da’s squeeze, I’d totally have a MILF.

With Great Page Visits Comes Great Responsibilities

Hobbies

My stats for Feb crested 8000 visits for my little, no-real-direction site. Yay us, funtime happy readers! Thank you! I’d use my hits but unfortunately some dorkass L337 black hat thought it would be cool to create a virus that references a long-erased .jpg from my site which skewers my stats to over a million hits a month (oddly enough the virus was quiet for Jan but last month it resurfaced in Japan sending my hits back up over 3 million).

But this morning I woke to find much of my post’s comments from last year spammed for the first time. Thankfully b2Evolution has a one click banning button that wipes all spam comments/referals or I’d still be logging IPs.

So you see kids, the web is a dirty place. A mean place. A place where thieves roll 20 sided dice and always come up over 15 (with a lock pick modifier of +3).

Hey Baby!

Personal Bits, Queer stuff

I’m late for work having just left the Eagle after dropping off posters with the general manager. I’m hustling my ass up Church street, wrestling to get my iPod into my breast pocket of my jacket and trying to figure out what the hell is blocking it’s entry. I’m a bit disheveled as usual.

I look up into the manly face of a bear with a thick, dirty blonde goatee, so thick his chiseled lips are barely visible (barely!), baseball cap, tuft of hair coming out of his shirt, and sharp blue eyes framed by the beginnings of crows feet. Blue eyes that do two things: make contact with mine (and in that moment, the universal gay TCP/IP is transmitted between us saying “hommina hommina!” “Arooogah!” and “Rrrrowl!” all at once).

And then they abruptly show confusion, revulsion. I’m passed by with no parting backward glances. What did I do to have that connection broken so quickly? Was it my pretentious over-priced music player? The makeshift pull ring on my broken zipper on my coat? My orange carry-all?

None of that. I realize I’m walking up Toronto’s most bitter and image conscious street, holding a half used tube of toothpaste like a dagger.

I had jammed the damned thing into my jacket that morning to bring back to my place from the boyfriend’s digs. As we made eye contact, I had pulled it out of my breast pocket to make room for the iPod. I guess he might have thought I was suggesting something.